It has taken great acts of self-control to avoid perusing the strollers, the car seats and the cute little holiday-themed footy pajamas at stores. I have moments of weakness where I'll bring home the cutest outfit that I just HAD to buy. After a few moments of contemplation and dirty looks, shame soon overtakes me and I put the outfits in a box at the back of a dark closet.
But this weekend, I crossed the line. The BIG line. I purchased a bike trailer. It has a little sling-type seat with two five-point harnesses. It has a rain guard and mesh windows. Heavy duty velcro strips lock the flap doors in place. It's lightweight and super-cute. It was difficult to maneuver out of my garage at first, but I eventually got the hang of it. With great care I pulled out blanket after blanket to line the trailer. I even put little treats in the pockets on each side so there was no fighting. I packed a veritable picnic for them to consume once we reached our destination. I loaded them up, donned my helmet and pulled out of our cul-de-sac, two little hot dogs in tow.
See? I told you that I was THAT person. I have sometimes carried my dogs around in purses (he was tiny). My house is dominated by the boys to whom I will be serving as long as they are around. I have purchased those goofy Halloween costumes and made the boys wear them. I purchase toy after toy for them to destroy (hubby thinks I should just let them eat money but I don't think it would be nearly as fun as a loofa dog). But this latest foray into the dogs-as-children world of merchandise was a disaster.
The screaming began shortly after I was 50 yards from home; shrill, eardrum splitting shrieks of pure horror. So I pulled over and put my hand inside to pull out a treat that I was saving for the ride home. No dice - in fact I received a nip on the hand in their desperate attempts to flee back home. A few neighbors started coming out of their houses to see what all the commotion was. Embarrassed, I smoothed out the velcro and started pedaling furiously toward my destination.
All along the way, it sounded as if I was toting a traveling tornado siren. They never calmed down and they never let up; I became worried that their incessant digging at the mesh windows would cause a rip that they could escape from. In the half mile trek to the park, we set off every dog along the way into a barking frenzy. My dear hubby, who was biking along with Maisie at a nice leisurely pace, conveniently dropped behind us far enough so that no one knew he was with us. Once I came to a stop...silence. In fact, I could walk the bike along the way and they were fine. But as soon as I started pedaling they went crazy.
I was hopeful that after an hour or so of running around at the park they would be calm on the way back. But they were just as bad on the way home. I pulled into the garage and let them out; I was exhausted. Indy immediately jumped out of the trailer. Paulie jumped out only to jump back in right away. He sniffed around and then laid down. Looking at me with the defiance that I've only seen in dachshunds and a handful of toddlers.
I'm not ready to give up yet. While they've hated every stupid costume I've ever made them wear, they eventually give up and resign themselves to the fact that I will put them in clothes occasionally. I have the same hope for the trailer.
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